Baby Yoda is no Dale Earnhardt – But Who Is?

With the incredible success of The Mandalorian, I’m not going to lie, I am a little bit torn.  The child in me is happy that the Star Wars universe actually came up with something that was entertaining.  After four of the last five main story movies in essence made me give up on the franchise, I am happy that they have come up with something that is finally appealing.

  While under a little bit of fire for not using enough women (we are talking bounty hunters, sketchy characters, and criminals, generally a male dominated industry), there has been very little whining from the millions of Star Wars fans, and I have a theory why.

  From my previous post “Star Bores”, I am a self admitted lost fan.  I grew up with 4-6, am old enough to have saw them in the theaters, am old enough to remember the lines that went down the block for every show on the weekend, for weeks.  How amazing the special effects Lucas came up with, the great characters, the great stories, the average dialog…I was a pie eyed boy soaking all of that up.

  And then they took an extended break.  The books were all we had, and with every one, Lucas claimed that none of them counted towards the main story.  Sure, they contradicted themselves at times, because there were various authors, and much like assholes, everyone has an opinion how it should go, but for the most part, everyone fleshed out the universe, gave us descriptions of different worlds, and warm fuzzy feelings about the franchise.

  Once 1,2, and 3 were released, they eschewed almost all of the fiction out there, because it wasn’t part of canon, went their own horribly misguided route, filled it with CGI, and I feel seriously crippled the franchise. 

  Unlike the Mandalorian, most of the fans agreed that these films were not good.  The started out gangbusters, and fans were thrilled that  there were new movies, but Star Wars fans go more than once to a movie, and after a few weeks, the complaints came fast and furious (another franchise that needs to die).  Personally, I am a movie rewatcher, and I can’t bring myself to rewatch these any more.  I’ve given 1 and 2 a few views, but 3 only once, because I just absolutely hate them.

  I liked 7, had hope, but 8 made 1,2, and 3 look like “cinema”.  I gave it a rewatch, then admonished myself for wasting two hours of my time.

  The franchise is in a freefall, and I blame Disney.  The stories have too many writers.  Instead of concentrating on putting out the best story, the focus is more on marketing.  What stars can we get?  (Thumbs up to Ewan McGregor, thumbs down to Samuel L Jackson and his purple lightsaber)  Are we racially balanced?  Do we have enough women in important roles?  What toys can we make?  Can we add characters to make more toys?

  So we got racially, genderally (not sure it’s a word, it is now, I will continue to use it) balanced movies, with shit stories behind them, with a ton of characters in them so they can thrive on the secondary market.

  As a shareholder, I think that this if a brilliant strategy.  My Disney stock brings me many happy, warm, tingly feelings.

  As a fan, I’m disgusted.  I’m sad.  I’m angry.  I feel that I have been cheated out of part of my youth.  I’m getting old, I only have so much of it left.

  And along comes The Mandalorian.  Billed as a sci-fi Western, it has brought to us the most vile creature since Jar Jar Binks, Baby Yoda

  Never has a creature been created, that has caused such a stir not only in the Star Wars Universe, but in the regular world as well.  You can NOT escape this thing.  I swear, every 10th post on facebook has this little creature in it.

  And in the long run, it’s a shame.

  The Mandalorian isn’t groundbreaking in its script writing.  If Firefly (overrated) and Big Daddy/Three Men and a Baby, had a baby, it might just be The Mandalorian.  That being said, the story has drawn in viewers in record numbers, and with that, has revitalized the Universe.  At least until Dec. 19th, when the newest disappointment will be released.

  Sadly though, the series is doomed.  It is supposed to be about a bounty hunter.  In my book, that should be plenty enough to go throughout the galaxies, you have interesting bounties, some politics leading up to the first order, you are dancing on the edge of that knife…but none of that matters.

  Baby Yoda matters.  Baby Yoda has the force (easily cured by Mucinex) within.  Baby Yoda is cute.  Baby Yoda has become the focus of the show.  You have to keep the creature in, or you lose the non Star Wars fans, that watch just for him.  You lose the merchandising.  You lose all sorts of money, because other than Dale Earnhardt, Elvis, and Michael Jackson, nobody really buys dead people’s stuff.  Baby Yoda is no Dale Earnhardt. 

  So you had a show with a cool premise, with a nice little plush character, that will now be held hostage by the plush character’s earning power.  Way to go Mickey!

  All hate mail can be tweeted to @rslavinsky , because he will agree with each and every one of you, band you all together, and then topple my twitter account @jaycanchu.  Or you can listen to his podcast Shootin’ the Sith Podcast, which is a clever name and has all you need to know about Star Wars.  I’m also on Instagram, and facebook, and I draw things as well as write about nonsense.

May the Earnhardt be With You

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.