10 Characters That I Avoid – Comics, Not Will Smith

Citizens, today’s list if 10 characters, if I see a comic is about them, I generally avoid it.  I’ve tried reading them, and either the character ends up being dumb, or they are over-saturated, or they just strike a chord in me.

  Now, I know that some of you, like Overlord John, is going to disagree with me, and the simple solution is to comment on the bottom, and tell me why I am wrong.  (I am not, it is my list.  If you want yours published, then you search out old comics they want and trade with them, and they will publish you)  I strongly urge you all to comment early, and often, much like voting in Chicago.

 The Joker  

Not only has that abysmal movie ruined the character for me, at least for a bit, but if I blindfolded you, sent you in a comic store, and you grabbed a book, there is a 25% chance that it involves the Joker.  He’s in the main stories for every god damn Batman book.  He’s a big part of the Harley Quinn history, so he pops up constantly in her books.  For some reason, they think “The Batman Who Laughs” is a good character, and that is half Joker/ half Batman.  I’m burnt out.  He needs to go away.  Something catastrophic can happen in the books, and they can lead up to his return in two years, and I think people would enjoy that.  I know they casual fans gravitate towards them, because everyone secretly wants to be a psychopathic clown, but become a juggalo.  We don’t need all these crappy extra short runs either.

Iron Man  

Now, I like the movies.  I like RDJ as Iron Man, and can’t imagine nobody else playing him.  If I see Iron Man on the cover, and it is a book after 1970, I don’t care to read it.  I’m always searching eBay for cool older books, often from characters or groups that I never read, but I’ve never cared for him, I know he’s had some interesting stories, but does nothing for me.

Superman  

My biggest issue with Superman is that, in theory, he should never lose.  Every time he faces an obstacle, he develops a skill or power to defeat it.  Granted, throughout the years, his powers have gone up and down, but when he’s fighting, unless its someone from a different dimension or world, odds are he’s not breaking a sweat defeating them.  As a man, we are allowed to hate a guy who’s super good looking, super athletic, and super smart.  Fuck you Superman.

Spider Whatevers  

I love Peter Parker as Spider-Man.  He is my all time favorite character (sorry Roachmill)  I don’t bother reading the rest.  Though I have relaxed my views on his son Ben inheriting his super powers, and his daughter, because it makes sense that he passed them along.  The odds of a radioactive spider biting anyone else, and them becoming another Spider-Man, as much chance as I have of marrying Margot Robbie.  So Miles Morales (yes, I know they don’t call him Spider-Man, but come on), Spider Boy, Spider Man 2099, Spider Girl, Arachnophilia, Scarlet Spider, Spider UK (if you pronounce UK as “uck”, that’s exactly how I feel}, Spider Man: India (okay, never saw him, might look out of curiousity), Mayhem, Spider Woman, Spider-Woman/Spider Gwen, Agent Venom, Spider Woman again, Superior Spider Man (though I love Otto Octavius), Spider Woman/Arachne/Madame Web, Scarlet Spider again, Arana/Spider Girl, Silk (her milk sucks too), Spider Girl/Mayday/Spider Woman, and Spider Ham (sorry Eli).  I may be missing out on some good stories, but I’m stubborn.

Venom  

I realize this is Sony’s way to cash in, since they can’t on Spider-Man, but not everything needs to be Venomized.  I’m going to throw in Carnage as well.  I know he’ll be in the next Venom flick, but hokey smokes, there doesn’t need to be this many titles, or side stories, or any of this.  Part of the appeal of a villain is that they disappear for awhile, and you actually wonder what they’ve been up to, or what they are plotting.  I get he goes back and fourth, is a bit of an anti-hero, but come on, just come on.

Dr Strange  

I loved the movie, I love the character in the movie, but to read the books…no thanks.  He just doesn’t do it for me, and I have no interest.  The actor who plays him is amazing, and I enjoy him in everything he does, whether he is good or not.  I wish the books got me as excited as seeing him in a movie.

Dark Archie 

Riverdale has grown up, and there are now adult problems, a TV show, biker gangs, and Jughead isn’t a glutton any more.  I learned to read, and grew up reading all the Archie comics as a kid.  It was lighthearted fun, corny jokes, integration (I see you Midge….and Chuck), everything that made them great.  Now you worry Betty and Veronica can get pregnant.  What the fuck happened?  Seriously, who thought this would be a good idea.  And the crossovers can eat a dick too.  No interest in Aliens vs Reggie.

Thor  

When I was a boy, I loved reading all about mythology, and for some reason, I just couldn’t get thru the Norse mythology.  Same with the comic books.  I do like that they have a more whimsical Thor in the movies, but I liked Loki as a character much better.  Until Ragnarak, the Thor movies rhymed with snore, and that is what I did when watching them.  Much like Iron Man, never grabbed my attention.  I like my muscular men Barbarians please.

Sub Mariner 

I like Aquaman, I should like Namor, but just…no.  At one point, he was a Top 3 character for Marvel, people loved him.  I do like that fact that he gets mad easily, sort of crotchety, and is ripped because of all the swimming, but if Aquaman was the joke for 25 years, then this guy should get his turn.

Moon Knight  

I know, there are about 74 rumored projects with this guy, and my desire to read him is nil.  He’s like Batman, but likes to play dress up as normal people too, then use the same skills Batman does to fight crime.  My dislike for him might also stem from wanting to put together a “Werewolf by Night” comic book run, and the #32 is Moon Knight’s first appearance, and makes it almost unaffordable…well, not really, but I’d have to save money and not buy other comics, so it would require patience.

So there are my 10 characters I basically ignore if I see them.  There are others, the kiddy comic books, TMNT as a rule and their spin offs, and others that I can’t think of. 

I suggest going to your Local Comic Shop, and instead of buying some of these old titles, maybe focus on one book from them, and invest the rest in some indy books.  Try out something new.  You might like it.

Gang, find me on Instagram and the Twitter machine @jaycanchu.  I try and put content on there every day.  Not all good content, but content.  Feel free to explore Spoiler Country, and read some great articles by Sara K, Eli explains Memes, Robert will inform you of every Star Wars rumor and tell you why it’s the greatest thing ever, and all the different podcasts that are part of the #spoilerverse.

                                              Read a book

                                                    Mista J

Author: Jay Roach

Jay was born and raised within a 30 mile radius of Ottawa IL, home of Scotty Bowers and a guy who was in soap operas.  His family was Catholic, somewhat filled with ’50 Ideals and conservatism, which they attempted to pass down, and lifetime Democrats.

Jay am none of that nonsense, though he is probably more liberal in social views than most of them.  He's tattooed, has two wonderful boys who are both talented, one a musician, the other designing games.  He have two ex wives that he still get along with.  Jay have two cats (Chloe and Panda Lucifer) who are ambivalent towards Jay's existence unless wet food is involved.

Previously, Jay was the cohost of My Worst Holiday, and left on good terms but will still fill in on occasion.  He now write nonsense articles about whatever grabs his fancy, from old Universal Monster movies, to lunch health, to lists that get stuck in deep in his head and has to purge them.

Jay is an amateur artist, who hopes to branch out into painting this year.  You can see his stuff on social media, or read his stuff in The Roach's Den.

Jay is pretty sure he is allowed to hang around because he have watched a LOT of Burt Reynolds movies. (This is true)

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